Crappy Birthday Shitface

Apparently, according to her, mother is planning a party for my birthday.

Oh, it’s apparently going to involve a keg. Apparently (word of the post, apparently ), all of the times I’ve proclaimed my hatred of keg parties just goes in one ear and right the fuck out of the other. No one I know or even like shows up at these things and I already know what’s going to happen. The same thing that happened at my last birthday party… mother hogged the fucking attention for herself, because God forbid someone have their own special day once a year.

I doubt it’s even going to come to fruition; but if it does and I decide to grace it with my presence, I reserve the right to leave whenever the fuck I want. I also reserve the right the curse people (i.e., mother) the fuck out when they (she) starts acting like a cunty twatface. And since she’s apparently (4) inviting people from work, I’d love for her to show her true colours.

I picture the entire affair ending with these (not the sexy men, unfortunately)…

Oh, and apparently, she was going to make it a surprise… no, just no thank you.