Darling Clementine

I totally told a truck driver to kiss my ass this morning. Motherfucker had it coming. I was not in the mood for smart-ass jokes about my work performance. Especially from some smelly loser. Allow me to start from the beginning…

Drivers come in to pick up some cheap shit. They’re early, so I’m not in the mood. I’m currently processing orders, so it’s going to be a minute. Georgia tells SmartAss McGee that I’m currently doing that and it’ll be a minute. (It doesn’t take me long, because I fucking rule.) I’m coming around the corner from the stairs as she’s telling him. Then as I’m picking up the folders, I hear this…

“[current real name] needs to step it up a notch.”

(cue me turning around with that LOOK on my face. oh yeah, peaches, you know that look i get when i’m going to get stabby.)

“You need to kiss my ass.”

Then cue his other smart-ass comment about me not having had my coffee this morning. I don’t drink coffee during the week and I manage just fine so SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU SMELLY LOSER.

I just ignored him and went about my business. I went back upstairs and came back down a few minutes later and he cracks off, “It’ll be OK, [current real name}.”

I swear to everything Holy I almost went over there and kicked him in his fucking shins. Anyway…

So, how is everyone? BRILLIANT!

“The 27th. I’ve been letting people know.”

(more…)

Apparently, according to her, mother is planning a party for my birthday.

(more…)

This is a few days old, but I just discovered a link to it; so, yeah.

Facebook Wants to Be Your One True Login

This is why morons shouldn’t be allowed to own computers. Seriously? I’m only up to page 7 of the comments right now; but seriously? Even after the article was edited to include the message that THIS SITE ISN’T FUCKING FACEBOOK, people are still *~*confused*~*.

This crap is fucking hilarious. I really, really wonder about some people’s literacy. Seriously, get grandma off the fucking computer.

Facebook – BLUE. RRW – RED. I know Facebook has been instituting a lot of changes lately, but Jesus-fucking-Christ people, they didn’t change the damn layout.

Stupid people make my brain hurt. I’m seriously wondering how these people manage to function in their daily lives if they can’t even manage to get to a fucking web site they apparently frequent like it’s going out of style. How do they work microwaves, or an ATM, or breathing?

Haha, this thread got me thinking. All these people use Google to get to Facebook? How do they get to Google? I’d have to guess their homepage is Google. Now if only there were a way to change that homepage to Facebook they’d be stuck!

Posted by: Rofl | February 11, 2010 2:50 PM

hahahahahaha! If you use Google to get to Google, is that like dividing by zero and destroying the world? YOU MOTHERFUCKER YOU JUST BROKE THE INTERNET.

/edit: Most of the stupid-asses have managed to click on the option that lets you comment with your Facebook details. Therefore, you have a face and profile to go along with the stupid. I’ve been visiting some of them… oh people older than me, .

So, since the Meth-Head is sooooo perfect and incapable of ever making a mistake (ha!)… I’ve been trying to sabotage her. Excuse me for a moment…

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Whew, that feels better. Are you fucking kidding me? What the fuck would I gain from trying to sabotage you? Seriously? Stop mainlining drain cleaner, idiot.

Seriously, though… if I was going to sabotage her, I wouldn’t make it so bleeding obvious. Plus, even if I were, the moron is so dumb she wouldn’t know it even if it jumped up and smacked her fucking ugly-ass teeth out.

I’ve had a raging headache all day, I’m not in the mood for these children.