Darling Clementine

Thursday may have been my last day at work. I’m still not entirely sure. I just can’t take the bullshit anymore. And as long as Dickface is in charge, the bullshit will continue. It will continue unchecked and unreprimanded because apparently The Bullshit is an expert dick-sucker.

We all know that I’ll just puss out and show up Monday morning like I wasn’t even thinking anything contrary. I’ll continue to bend over and take it up the tailpipe all while silently bitching and cursing my own existence. Because I’m a huge pussy and won’t find anywhere else to work. Because I enjoy being treated like shit, apparently. Because I’m just so beaten down by life and have no motivation or willpower to do anything else.

I’d say that this new year will bring changes, but… it won’t. I’ll just sit back and do the same old shit and try to not kill myself just like the previous year. Epiphanies and whatnot can feel free to jump in at any time… because Lord knows I’m not going to do it myself.

It finally happened… my meth-head coworker tried to blame one of her fuck-ups on me. I about elbowed that bitch in the teeth. I ignored her the entirety of Tuesday, the only exception being when I had to ask her something. The funny thing is, the bitch is so thick & brain-damaged she didn’t even notice. She stood there in front of my desk flapping her noise hole off about something or other while I just continued what I was doing, not once looking up at her. I should have told her to shut up and go back to gargling the boss’s balls, but I chose to just ignore her. Eh, fuck her… and him.

Whatever, that’s OK, because shit’s about to go down.

I try to be nice to everyone I come across… even when they don’t deserve it. I try to balance out my zen with my desire to punch (universal) you in the face. I try to remain positive even when I want to bitch up a blue streak. I try, I really do. But, some people just test my friggin’ patience.

But, you know what? I’m sick of being nice to people who don’t deserve it. Hell, I’m sick of being nice to people who do. I’m just sick of being nice. I’m not going to go out of my way to be an asshole, but I’m damn sure not gonna hold back when you’re being stupid… or whatever.

This week has tested my anxiety & stress levels so much that I feel ill. My entire body hurts, my kidneys feel like they’re trying to claw their ways out of my back and I’m nauseous. Even the bones in my feet hurt. I’m so glad I have today off, or I might have snapped.

And another thing… I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT. Yeah, everyone knows… so-and-so is a bitch and you’re always the victim. You don’t like anyone, we get it. The day you say a genuinely nice thing about anyone, I’ll fucking die of shock. I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT; but yet, you keep blathering on about the same damn thing over and over again.

I’m feeling all stabby again. Must stop thinking about it, enjoy my nice cup of coffee, and then head to WalMart to stock up on some cheap shit. “I don’t shop at WalMart.” Well, la-dee-fucking-dah, good for you.

Why is it always men bitching about what women choose to do with their bodies? I mean, really. How is it any of your business? For about 20 minutes before lunch today I was regaled with everything GODGODGOD and a little abortion mixed in. I about sliced some motherfuckers.

I can handle GODGODGOD for a good amount of time before I start getting twitchy… as long as it’s not asinine, like most of today’s was. But I can’t really tolerate the other. The only time you should be concerned with that topic is if it comes up between you and your wife/girlfriend/lover/one-night stand. Seriously. None of your beeswax.

I had to stand there and concentrate on taping cheap-ass toys guns into bags before I turned around and popped off, “I’m going to go have 19 abortions just because you fuckers are starting to piss me off.”

This week can kiss all kinds of my ass… and it’s only Wednesday. Thank whatever, I have ALL of next week off. I need it.